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I'm Liberian

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A: "Where you from?" B: "I'm Liberian" A: "Oh, sorry!" A(Whispering):"where you from?"
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives.

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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives. I said, “No, I don’t hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine.”
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Math: the only place where people buy 60 watermelons, and nobody wonders why.

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Math: the only place where people buy 60 watermelons, and nobody wonders why.
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About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard...

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About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard... After that, he went downhill fast.
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I work as a waiter...

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I work as a waiter... The pay isn’t great but I put food on the table.
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Incredibly, people never expect to get hit with a snowball in the house

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Incredibly, people never expect to get hit with a snowball in the house
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I accidentally sent my friend flowers over the internet...

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I accidentally sent my friend flowers over the internet... Whoops, E-Daisies.
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